The Value Of Perseverance Explained To Children
Teaching the value of perseverance to children is important for several reasons. Recent studies have shown that self-control and perseverance are helpful in improving school grades, regardless of the IQ.
Even our personal beliefs about commitment can affect academic achievement. There are more children who think commitment leads to success than those who think ability is an immutable trait.
However, perseverance is something that can hardly be imparted directly. It’s more about stimulating learning by helping children find activities to be passionate about enough to engage and learn to be highly motivated.
Children who believe in the value of perseverance can do great things, as long as they are convinced they can do it. For this reason it is essential to teach them not to give up, to persevere.
Passing on perseverance to children: the importance of language
How we ask a child to lend a hand affects how he will accomplish the task and, therefore, how we will convey the value of perseverance to him . In this regard, a study recently published in the journal Child Development (Foster-Hanson, 2018) reveals that encouraging children to “help out” rather than asking them to be “helpers / collaborators” can motivate them not to give up on a challenge. difficult for them.
The research, conducted by a staff of scientists from the University of New York, suggests that the use of verbs to indicate actions to children – as well as when we encourage them to help, to read, to paint – can increase resilience to sequel of defeats which they will inevitably encounter.
These findings contrast with those of a 2014 study that asking children to “help” rather than “ask for their help” would lead them to help more. The difference between the 2014 study and the more recent one is that the latter took into account what happened as a result of the setbacks that the children encountered in trying to help; which underlines that the choice of language can be hampered by the perseverance of children.
Emily Foster-Hanson, one of the lead authors of the study, explains that this study shows that talking to children about possible steps to take can awaken them to greater perseverance following a defeat.
Key elements for teaching children the value of perseverance
Working with children on the value of perseverance from an early age will help and guide them through life’s various challenges. These are some strategies that allow us to teach and transmit the value of perseverance to children:
Talk to the child about perseverance
When children periodically hear about perseverance, they will show more interest in it, especially as they grow up. Hearing about perseverance will cause them to see it as an interesting trait and they will be more willing to learn and understand what it means.
Maintain a positive attitude to teach the value of perseverance
It is very difficult to teach the concept of perseverance without a positive attitude. While it may seem to us that the child is not understanding or showing little interest, it is up to us, as guardians, to keep morale high. Children, sooner or later, will let themselves be infected by this positive attitude.
Be a model of perseverance
Children learn more from what they see than from what they hear. For this reason, it is very important to be aware of what is being said and done; in this sense, we always lead by example, whether it is good or bad. A demonstration by adults is a valuable learning experience for children.
The child must have responsibilities
Having responsibilities from an early age is a great way to acquire the value of perseverance. It is important to start with something simple and suitable for each child’s age.
We don’t save children, but we give them a little push if they need it
Acquiring the value of perseverance goes hand in hand with acquiring independence. If the child is struggling to succeed in something, do not intervene to save him.
You will not do him any favors by climbing the stairs that he, with his commitment, is able to climb. On the other hand, even if you decide to help him, the ideal is to let him take on all the responsibilities he is able to take on. For example, let him dress himself and put his clothes in order, even if you help him tie his shoes afterwards.
Give children a chance to succeed in teaching the value of perseverance
It is very important that the child faces challenges that he is able to overcome , even if these require a lot of effort. If he never succeeds in anything, his perseverance will hardly be strengthened.
Learn that the effort is worth it
When kids get used to getting everything on the first try, it’s common for them to discard options that require too much effort. Many, in fact, learn what to do in order not to have to try too hard: from successes in school – they help me or do my homework for me – to pass the level of a video game (watching tutorials on Youtube, for example).
In this sense, it may not be easy to convey to your children the idea that not only the goal counts, but also – and often much more – how it is reached. A key concept when it comes to teaching the value of perseverance to children. This is why it is so important to reward their efforts first and foremost, just as it is important to praise them and / or reward them in some way for their successes.
