I Love You: You Have To Say It Every Day
It is rather singular and curious that it was a very shy and reserved French painter like Pierre Bonnard who uttered the phrase “Draw, paint and express what you like”. That a man famous for his sensitivity and sobriety advised not to let a single day pass without expressing emotions and feelings, without addressing a I love you to loved ones, is truly amazing.
If the most shy and reserved people are able to observe beauty, understand it and express it, giving proof of enormous sensitivity, anyone could say I love you to those who deserve their affection and their friendship.
Letting emotions and feelings flow isn’t just good behavior, it’s also necessary. Do not believe that flaunting your emotions is negative, rather it is a habit that protects mental and physical health.
Alexithymia: the disease of those who do not express their emotions
Not expressing emotions is a social behavior that, despite being widely accepted, is bad for human health. So much so that this symptom is considered the basis of a disorder identified as alexithymia.
Alexithymia occurs in those people who are unable to recognize, express or verbalize their emotions. So not giving voice to emotions can cause serious behavior and mental health problems. There are cases of depression, social isolation and somatization due to the inability to channel and release a river of feelings.
However, alexithymia can also cause physical problems resulting from psychological difficulties. For example, it could cause stomach pain, heart attacks, high blood pressure, ulcers, and irritable bowel syndrome, to name but a few.
Alexithymia has even more dire consequences. Living without knowing how to express a love for you can cause a great deterioration in social relations.
Extreme cases of alexithymia
To talk about extreme cases of alexithymia, we use a particular television series that a few years ago enjoyed some success in various countries of the world. We are talking about Dexter, whose protagonist is played by actor Michael C. Hall.
The protagonist of the series, called Dexter, had behaviors bordering on psychosis due to his inability to empathize, express feelings and even feel them. For him, saying I love you was a real agony.
Evidently, this is an extreme and fictitious case. However, it can serve as a starting point to look for similar symptoms in each of us and to understand if we may be suffering from alexithymia to a greater or lesser degree.
Not knowing how to say I love you : a problem rooted in society
According to the Spanish Society of Neurology, up to 10% of the population worldwide suffers from alexithymia, so it is clear that it is a problem that affects a good number of people, many of whom may be close to us.
In order to recognize people with this disease, we must pay attention to their empathic or expressive capacity. Those who have had strokes, brain tumors or head injuries may also be affected.
The brain allows us humans to feel love, happiness or fear and allows us to relate feelings and emotions with words. A mental function that goes beyond social conditioning, which can actually be a need.
According to Dr. Pablo Duque, of the Spanish Society of Neurology, “the inability to recognize and verbalize emotions and feelings is caused by a break in the connection between brain structures”.
It is evident that expressing emotions, showing feelings or saying I love you is not only beautiful and pleasant, it is also a psychological need that improves mental and physical health.
