I Like Humble People Who Surprise With Their Actions
I like people like this, humble of heart, with a captivating smile and heart of gold, who surprise me every day with their actions. They are people who speak and respect their word, who do not know the exaggerated egos and disguised falsehoods. I like these magical people, disguised as ordinary people.
And who wouldn’t love them? However, we know that personalities of this type can be counted on the fingers of one hand. We live in an individualistic society that is increasingly oriented towards exteriority, in which exhibitionist behaviors and grandiloquent excesses are common, in which the obsession with being admired at every moment exhausts and suffocates us.
Paul-Claude Racamier, the famous French psychoanalyst, founded the term “perverse narcissist” years ago. This is undoubtedly the most extreme version of this profile. These people not only live focused on their infallibility and perfection, but also exercise a persistent moral offense with which to humiliate others and shine even more in their own eyes.
Living under such dynamics can destroy our mental health. It is necessary to change our daily relationships. We must dedicate ourselves to people who do not focus their life as if it were a perennial exhibition, but who are in a discreet and privileged corner where there is understanding, wisdom and respect for others.
Presumptuous people and people who comfort
A very common trait of the chronic narcissist is their tendency to make promises that they will never fulfill. He is dependent on the use of the personal pronoun “I”, with which he begins each of his sentences, makes a grain of sand a majestic cathedral and is an overbearing architect of his omnipotent universe. He knows it all, he has seen it all and he has lived it all and, if he has not done so, he invents it with a patina of just glamor.
The most curious fact about these people is that we are able to identify them almost immediately. Lies have short legs and vanity is very noticeable. However, sometimes, despite having noticed for a long time their many shortcomings and the emptiness of their hearts, inhabited by cobwebs, it is not so easy to defend themselves. It is not easy to live with a chronic narcissist, especially if it is our father, our mother or our partner.
According to an article published in the scientific journal PsychCentral , there is a fundamental aspect that can cure and comfort a person who has just lived an emotional relationship with a presumptuous profile: to feel that there are selfless people, beings capable of surprising their loved ones without expecting nothing in return. Because good individuals are not in danger of extinction, no matter what you think. It’s just that they are discreet, they don’t make noise, they don’t want to have an audience, they speak the right way and they know how to act at the right moment.
Humility continues to surprise us today
The most inflated ego is the germ that rests in those walls among which many remain isolated in their vast peninsulas of solitude. We all know someone who wears this modern mask with which, as if it were an expression of Greek theater, it represents pride and the need for attention to believe that it means something.
Perhaps for this very reason, having become accustomed to individuality mixed with the need for attention, we continue to be surprised so much by humble gestures and by the people who perform them with the sole motivation of seeing others happy.
When a stranger spontaneously does something for us, we immediately wonder what prompted him to do so. When a friend surprises us with a little thought, favor, or good deed, we often say something like “I’ll give it back” or “I owe you”.
Many of us have the principle of reciprocity firmly anchored in the depths of our hearts. However, it would be good to accept these gestures with total openness, without obsessing over what we should and should not do in the future. It is simply a matter of appreciating that moment, that generous and selfless action that only wants to give us happiness.
These magical people disguised as ordinary people expect nothing in return. Because what is done with the heart does not accept rewards: the greatest toll is knowing that the action performed has caused a smile, comforted and sowed trust in the human being in people’s hearts, which we should never lose.
We know that there are individuals who need a catwalk to feel like someone, that false appearances grow like bad grass. However, beyond this need for attention, there is nothing but loneliness and a profound emotional immaturity.
We must therefore learn to be satisfied with what we have, to not need anyone to know who we are and how much we are worth; in this way, we will be able to give the best of ourselves to others in a completely disinterested way.
Images courtesy of Vladimir Kush and Anne Kirsukov
