Getting The Respect Of Children In 21 Moves

Many parents think their children are obligated to respect them. Respect, however, is earned day by day. Here are the best strategies to achieve this. 
Get the respect of your children in 21 steps

Children and adolescents speak impulsively, it is their nature, but this does not mean that they are allowed to respond with profanity or in a disrespectful way, especially to parents and teachers. Children often tend to show little or no respect for adults. If you are a parent, know that you can, indeed you must, win the respect of your children even if at this moment the obstacles seem insurmountable.

Respect should not be taken for granted in the parent-child relationship. Undoubtedly it is a value that must be shown to anyone. At the same time, however, respect for children cannot be demanded, but must be won.

How to get the respect of your children

As parents, we expect respect from children. But we must conquer it. Relationships with a child can be complicated. It is the adult, however, who must lay the foundations to obtain their esteem, and not wait for a sense of duty to dictate the behavior or attitude of the children.

There is good news and bad news. The bad news is that once lost esteem is hard to recover, especially if our behavior doesn’t deserve it. The good news is that it’s never too late to win the respect of your children, even if you have to acknowledge your mistakes and be humble.

Father and son punch to fist.

The following are some daily strategies that will help you win or regain the respect of your children.

  • You first respect your children. Children imitate our attitudes; if we respect them, they will respect us.
  • The relationship comes before the rules. Rules are important, but they can’t be more important than the parent-child relationship.
  • Make your expectations clear. When they are not, misunderstandings arise. Being clear reduces the number of conflicts.
  • Be a person of integrity. Be honest when talking to your children, as in all relationships. Children will acquire this value.
  • Take leadership in the family. Lead by example, show the way, motivate your children, be understanding. In short, be good leaders.
  • Share your values ​​and beliefs with your children, but don’t force them to adopt them. When they are able to understand them, they will recognize you as a person of sound principles.
  • Be reasonable, especially when your children aren’t. Remember, the way you act when you are angry is the same way they will behave in the same situation.
  • Don’t be too critical. When parents are very demanding, children begin to avoid challenges. Indeed, they begin to secretly follow their projects knowing that they do not get support, but judgments.
  • Listen. A fundamental component of respect is listening. If you listen to your children, the chances that they will listen to you will increase. As always, you are their role model.
Mother trying to get the respect of her children.
  • Involve children in the choice of rules and limits. This will make them feel considered. Listen to their point of view and take it into account, without losing sight of that red line you are not willing to negotiate on. You have to be flexible, but don’t go beyond the point where education breaks down.
  • Be an example to follow. Your children are watching you, whether you are aware of it or not. Therefore, adopt the behaviors that you would like to see in them. In short, translate what you preach into practice.
  • Recognize your children’s efforts and praise them when they do well. This is important, even if the result isn’t quite perfect.
  • Ask for their opinion on the issues that concern them. They will appreciate the gesture and feel important.
  • Don’t assume you know how they feel. Maybe you understand what they are going through, but let them explain it. Don’t give lessons based on your experience.
  • Keep calm. To gain the respect of children, you need to demonstrate that you know how to manage emotions.
  • Don’t threaten them. This increases family discussions and creates a climate in which respect cannot flourish. Instead of threatening, engage.
  • Give it a chance. Allowing your children to make decisions gives them power, a sense of control, to be masters of their own life.
  • Show interest in what they care about: activities, friendships, personal tastes. It is not necessary to share them, but never judge them.
  • Do fun things together – these enjoyable moments will help you build strong bonds.
  • Don’t give unsolicited advice when facing a challenge unless absolutely necessary. Better help them analyze the problem.
  • Respect your partner and your parents. It is the best example.

It is not just a matter of example. Respect for ourselves, for others and the environment around us are the basis of a good education, but also of a happy and mentally healthy growth.

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